Closure.

Teren,

Congrats on finishing College. I hope all is well for you. I'm writing this e-mail on a hot South Carolina day in August and it will not be sent to you for a couple months.

I don't like how things ended up between us, however that's life and there is very little i can do but accept that. I can't make you forgive me, that's something you're going to have to do on your own and if you refuse then i suggest you go ahead and hate me forever.
I quite enjoyed the times that we had together and since you don't trust me then you might think that most everything i said to you was a lie. Go ahead, who am i to try and change your thinking. That's what i love about you.

God, i was so serious when i said that i wanted to be with only you and could see us growing old knitting afghans on a front porch somewhere in rural America. I think you knew this was true, and it might have scared you a little bit. It broke my heart not that you broke up with me, i would have expected that from someone of your character. What really broke my heart and made me feel like a piece of shit is the way that you could never forgive me and move on and basically told everyone of your friends. You will never look at me the same again.

Even right now, almost a year after the fact while reading this my face is synonymous with that act. People do things they aren't proud of Teren. Do you not think i have not learned from my mistakes? Have you never made a mistake? I'm sure your closet is quite spotless, there are ghost in everyone's past. Your glass house isn't so sound. My dad told me "Steven, love is forgiveness and true love is true forgiveness" He's a smart man.

So after the initial shock i bought a dog, went fishing, played the harmonica drunk and walked on train tracks. I thought about it from a logical point of view. If you really wanted to have stayed with me you would have. I'm here to tell you that you have made a mistake because you know a person is not solely defined by one action they make over the course of a lifetime. You know the person i am, you've seen it. I have never been as happy as i was the day we ate cupcakes in Charleston, or the day we feed turtles potato chips at the pond, or the day that i dragged your dead weight up three flights of stairs on your birthday. I love you Teren, Maybe one day you'll find someone perfect. and i wish you only the best.

-Steven